Improved: The sentences are difficult to understand, not because they are long but because they are obscure.
Awkward: He explained that the advertising campaign had been successful, business had increased more than forty per cent, and additional capital was sorely needed.
Improved: He explained that the advertising campaign had been successful, that business had increased more than forty per cent, and that additional capital was sorely needed.
在商业和正式文件写作中,越来越多的用到圆点散句。除了更易读之外,它们更能从视觉上引起人们注意。作者需要决定在圆点之后用什么形式来写,是用名词,动词,形容词,副词,还是介词短语,定语从句甚至完整的句子。应该记住的是它们相互间应该保持一致。平行结构较多用。
Examples:
Our recommendations for improving computer-user comfort are as follows:
· Anti-radiation screens should be available for computer monitors.
· Wrist supports should be used to help maintain proper wrist position during computer use and possibly reduce the risk of carpal tunnel syndrome.
· Employees need adjustable chairs with a stronger back support